That Nagging Thought

Have you ever had a nagging thought that just didn’t seem to go away? The kind of thought that comes after you have done something that you feel really awful about. Let’s say you said something you didn’t mean, to a friend or colleague. Then you have an after thought and it only gets bigger and bigger and won’t seem to stop. I’ve totally been there!

I have learned over time how to get unstuck from these never ending thinking tunnels, when it seems you can’t stop thinking what a “stupid” thing you did or said. I believe there is a way that will lead you to peace.

I have learned to just notice and observe that this topic is taking up a lot of thinking space. I also take notice that the other person probably isn’t spending as much time as I am on this subject. This preoccupation will only send me into sadness, anger or the d-word (depression). I’ve been there done that and don’t want to repeat this pattern.

I then begin to make affirmative statements that focus on gratitude. I start listing everything that I’m grateful for until my emotion begins to shift. I may even conduct a breathing exercise. I then reach out and call someone who’s neutral and who will listen and validate me. If you’re a part of the 12-step community, the phone list is amazing.

The next step, after I have reduced my emotions, I think about how to problem-solve the matter. I brainstorm ideas, I look at the ones I think would be the most helpful and make a plan to go forward or decide that no action is the best step. And most importantly, I let go of the outcome. Let it go!

Every time the thought wishes to surface again, I follow the steps above. I tell myself that I will not let my mind take control of this matter. I see my thoughts come in and out like a wave or see them slip away into the nothingness which they came.

Quote of the Month

The greatest gift that you could ever give to another is your own happiness, for when you are in a state of joy, happiness, or appreciation, you are fully connected to the Stream of pure, positive Source Energy that is truly who you are. And when you are in that state of connection, anything or anyone that you are holding as your object of attention benefits from your attention.

Esther & Jerry Hicks

Upcoming Events

Learn how to communicate honestly with others, gain insight and manage emotions effectively. Please contact me for an interview session if interested in joining this group.

Women’s Psychotherapy Group
Monday at 7:30 p.m. – 9 p.m. in Beverly Hills, CA
2 Spaces Available!